I wish I hadn’t sworn so much during pregnancy. What if I get an angry baby?

Mums confess their greatest regrets while they were pregnant

From spending far too much of a pushchair that’s also a car seat and a crib, to swearing too much in front of their as-yet unborn child, Britain’s mums have listed their top regrets while they were pregnant.

In fact, it seems that the nine months that should be filled with hope and joy are filled with worry and batting away unwanted advice, says a company which banks stem cells from new-borns for future use.

According to the UKs family stem cell bank StemProtect.co.uk, mums’ regrets range from the good old-fashioned bizarre cravings, all the way up to being drawn in and bamboozled by new technology that promises to make their lives better.

“I’m a parent myself,” says StemProtect.co.uk spokesperson Mark Hall, “And I can personally identify with some of these.

“But this is about mums – they’re the ones who’ve had to do all the hard work, had their hormones and bodies assaulted from all angles, and live with the worry that they’re not going to be a textbook mother.”

StemProtect.co.uk spokes to scores of new mothers (2300), and asked them about the things they regret the most about the nine months of pregnancy and the weeks immediately following birth. The most popular answers (in no particular order) were:

Giving in to cravings
Going to pre-natal classes
Taking partner to pre-natal classes
Allowing myself to be photographed while eight months gone
Listening to useless advice from friends and relatives
Buying loads of trendy and ultimately useless gadgets
Spending a small fortune on the nursery
Spending a small fortune on the pushchair
Listening to classical music because it’s supposed to be soothing
Listening to those whale song and pan pipe CDs that you can only buy in tourist attraction gift shops because they’re supposed to be soothing
Smoking
Giving up smoking and choosing ridiculous vape flavours
Drinking
Swearing in front of the foetus
Stem cell banking
The reasons given by some mums throw some light onto their regrets:

Julia: “I wish I hadn’t sworn so much during pregnancy. All the time I thought ‘What if I get an angry baby? What if she can hear me?'”

Paula: “We spent a significant four-figure sum on a pushchair that’s also a car seat and a crib. The only thing that it doesn’t do is change nappies. Total waste of money, we use the stroller we got for a fiver at a car boot sale most of the time.”

Terri: “I wish I hadn’t wasted weeks and weeks going to pre-natal classes. In the end I learned everything I needed from my mum and the internet. Also, taking my hubby to pre-natal classes, that’s a big regret too.”

Kerry: “I’m really pleased that I gave up smoking. Not so pleased that I switched to vaping thinking it was safer. All I did was switch one lot of chemicals for another, and it worries the hell out of me.”

Gita: “So many pan pipe CDs. What was I thinking? The charity shop got them.”

Jill: “Stem cell banking. Sounds horrendously trendy, but I wish we’d done it. Our little one’s healthy, but you never know.”

Joanna: “I had a huge falling out with my partner over my craving – the smell of freshly-laid tarmac. I had her drive me all over the town looking for roadworks, and it drove her up the wall. Why couldn’t it be Marmite?”

StemProtect.co.uk’s Mark Hall: “Some of these regrets seem trivial in retrospect, others are genuine concerns for their past behaviour.

“For example, switching from smoking to vaping is a step into the unknown at the moment, no matter mum is worried sick about it.”

But in the end, as long as baby is healthy and happy in a loving household, that’s all that’s important, and regrets be damned, he says.

“Regrets should be left in the past. Look to your baby’s future.”